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After December 31st at midnight, the year 2013 is just a memory. For some, it's a bad memory; for others, a wistful time when goals were achieved and ambitions realized.

Regardless of what last year brought, the desire to joyfully set forth New Year's Resolutions around January 1st rears its ugly head in the collective unconscious. Why ugly? Because roughly 70% of all such resolutions never make it past the first month! Then those who practice this exercise in futility chalk up the whole ritual as useless... another indication that they are a loser who "just can't get a break."

It doesn't have to be this way, however. In this article I will share my "12 Step Program" for keeping Resolutions that does NOT involve standing up in a group and saying "Hi, my name is Michael and I'm a resolution failure." It does, however, involve a bit of self-reflection with a large slice of humility and honesty. So ready? Here goes...

STEP 1 - Write down what you love. Most people are too busy taking care of life - and others - that they neglect their own needs and wants. Make a list of about 20-25 things without stopping to think what these things are, or HOW you are going to do them. Just go with your gut feeling... and do it QUICKLY! If you go too slowly, you will be inclined to think too much and over-rule your gut instincts. Once you make the list, prioritize them - again not on what you think is possible, but on what makes your heart sing the most!

STEP 2 - Write down your "Sticky Things." These are things that stand in the way of your getting what you love. These are also the "messes" in life - physical messes, emotional baggage, or mental beliefs or mind viruses ("memes") that block your path to happiness and peace. The list can be long or short, but be as complete as you can.

STEP 3 - Write down your Legacy. If you were to die at the end of next year, how would you want to be remembered? As a loving parent? A successful coach? A best-selling author of a book on relationships? Using Step 1 answers as a guide; your legacy wishes should reflect your deepest love or solution to some of the more chronic Sticky Things.

STEP 4 - Write down the Five (5) Things you can commit to accomplishing in 2014. These can be medium-term goals, such as renovating your house, or more long-term goals like building your business. If the latter, write down the action steps you can take to move further along this path, such as developing a marketing program or hiring and training an assistant. At least 2 of these 5 things should be about Sticky Things, i.e., messes you want to clean up or overcome.

[http://www.theguardian.com/education/mortarboard/2014/jan/01/new-years-resolutions-students new year]